Narcissism and the
Dynamics of Evil
(Published at www.lifeissues.net)
D. McManaman

The first step to appreciating the subtleties of evil is to
begin at the most basic level of philosophical inquiry, the philosophy
of being. Evil, as St. Augustine pointed out centuries ago, is
not a positive quality or a substance, but a privation or corruption of
being. This implies that "good" is a property of being.
Whatever is, is good insofar as it is.
When we speak of good food, for example, we mean much more than that it
simply tastes good. We mean that is good for us. Such food
promotes the fullness of our being. Food that is bad for us
brings about a corruption or deficiency of health. Aristotle
wrote that the good is that which all things desire.[1]
This, despite appearances, is congruent with the notion that the "good"
is fullness of being; for all things desire first and foremost their
own perfection, that is, all things desire "to be" and "to be" most
fully. Good and being are the same thing. Evil is thus a
lack of due being. It is a deficiency, a corruption, a privation,
a lack of something that should be there.
Consider a deformity of any kind. What is physically deformed
lacks something that it ought to have. A bird that has one wing
suffers from a physical evil and as a result cannot fly, that is, it
cannot function as it belongs to a bird to function.
Moral evil is also a lack, a deficiency, or a privation, but one far
more complicated than physical evil. For everyone understands the
nature of a bird, and so it is immediately obvious that a one winged
bird is deformed. But in order to understand moral evil, it is
necessary to understand the basic requirements of the natural moral
law, and unless one understands these, moral evil is not always easy to
spot.
Moral evil is primarily about a disordered will; for only a being with
intellect and will is a moral agent. That is why irrational
animals are not treated as moral agents and held responsible for what
they do. They literally don't "know any better". A good
will, however, is one that "wills the good". This is what love
is: willing the good of another (benevolence). But there are a
number of goods
that
are specifically human, intelligible, and basic, that is, sought for
their own sake and not for the sake of some other end. Such basic
intelligible human goods include human life, the knowledge and
contemplation of truth, the experience and contemplation of beauty,
leisure, marriage, harmony between oneself and others, oneself and God,
and
harmony within oneself (integrity). The moral life has to do
fundamentally with our relationship to the entire network of these
human goods. Basic human goods are aspects of human persons, and
so a good will is one that is open to the entire network of human goods
in oneself and in others, that is, wherever there is an instance of
human being.
An evil action is one that involves a will that is incompatible with an
openness to the complete integration of basic human goods. Such a
will is evil, because it is deficient, or lacking an order that it
ought to
have. For example, justice is the constant will to render to
another his due. An unjust act involves a refusal to render
another his due, such as the truth, or property, or reverence
of his life, etc. Or, consider the act of treating another as a
means to an end. In this case, a basic human good is treated as
an instrumental good.
The life of the other is subordinated to
my own and is reduced to a means to my own ends. In other words,
I treat my own life as an end, to be revered for its own sake, but I
treat another's life as a means. But what is due to another is
that he be treated in a way that respects his status as equal in
dignity to myself. I willingly refuse that equality, thus failing
to render that debt.
Just as a bird is good insofar as it has being, but suffers from a
physical evil insofar as it lacks what ought to be there (i.e., another
wing), so too an evil will is good insofar as it has being, but is evil
in its deficiency. And since a moral agent is what he wills, we
do not say that a person suffers from a moral evil as we might suffer
from a physical evil. Rather, a person who commits moral evil is
evil. Only moral agents can be
evil.
And so evil is parasitic. Its host is always a good. And
since evil is a kind of non-being or nothingness, pure evil is
impossible. Pure evil would be completely nothing, and
nothing is not evil; it simply 'is not'. Evil is a privation that
requires a subject in which to inhere. St.
Augustine writes:
...there is nothing of what we call
evil, if there be nothing good. But a good which is wholly
without evil is a perfect good. A good, on the other hand, which
contains evil is a faulty or imperfect good; and there can be no evil
where there is no good. From all this we arrive at the curious
result: that since every being, so far as it is a being, is good, when
we say that a faulty being is an evil being, we just seem to say that
which is good is evil, and that nothing but what is good can be evil,
seeing that every being is good, and that no evil can exist except in a
being. Nothing can be evil except something which is good.[
2]
The Making of a Narcissist
Human persons engage in a kind of self-making whenever they make
choices.
The reason is that we are what we will. It was
Sartre who said that existence precedes essence, and that we determine
our essence by our absolutely free choices.[3]
Only if we substitute
the
word "essence" with "character" is Sartre correct. There is
a relationship between choosing (doing) and becoming (being). We
are (character) what we
choose. Nothing is more intimately our own than our
character, which is determined by nothing other than our free and
self-determined choices. And since evil is a
privation, a kind of non-being or nothingness, the more one makes
morally evil choices, the "less" one becomes. In other words,
choosing moral evil, such as treating another or others as a means to
an end, brings about a shrinkage, a lessening of the self. If
perpetuated and unrepented, such de-creation leads to a kind of
self-loathing; for
there is less of oneself to love--just as the more one severs pieces of
one's face with a knife, the more unsightly he becomes and the more
horrified he is as he beholds his reflection in a mirror.[4]
Beauty is also a property of being. To be more fully is to be
more beautiful. But disease or corruption involves a deprivation
of beauty. What is morally noble is beautiful (kalon), but what
is morally evil is ignoble and morally unsightly. That is why one
who commits to injustice or who gives himself to evil for the sake of
ends that are good becomes morally unsightly to himself, as well as to
those who
see him as he is. He
becomes ugly. Hence, the self-loathing that is part and parcel of
the depraved.
Another property of moral evil, concomitant to self-loathing, is
egotism.
Consider that injustice is the freely willed decision not to render to
another his due, whether it is truth, property, liberty, impartial
treatment, or reverence of his life. The golden rule is a
traditional formulation of the requirement of fairness: do unto others
what you would have others do unto you, or,
do not do to others what you yourself dislike. Injustice is
precisely a failure to love another as another self. The unjust
man treats
himself with a degree of partiality, and he fails to recognize the
other's status
as a person equal in dignity, to be treated as an end in himself.
The unjust man has thereby established a degree of
egotism within himself; for he has made himself larger than another, at
least in his own eyes and according to his own behaviour. As
Vladimir Solovyov writes: "The basic falsehood
and evil of egoism lie ... in the fact that, ascribing to himself in
all justice an absolute significance, he unjustly refuses to others
this same significance. Recognizing himself as a center of life (which
as a matter of fact he is), he relegates others to the circumference of
his own being and leaves them only an external and relative
value."[5]
This egotism can be relatively mild, or it can reach
pathological proportions. For there is a fundamental difference
between the sinner and the one who sins. Everyone sins, but not
everyone is given over to sin, that is, not everyone loves sin.
Some have made a commitment to do battle against their own tendency to
sin, while others have simply surrendered to a life that places the
self at the center. The refusal to behold one's own moral
unsightliness--and thus the refusal of repentance and moral
growth--brings about a conflict that demands resolution. Such a
person is aware of his own moral deficiency and loathes himself
accordingly. The degree of his self-loathing corresponds to the
degree of his depravity. At the same time, though, he has
surrendered to an egotism that is part and parcel of an unjust
character. The egotist that he has become cannot tolerate the
awareness of his
unsightly ignobility. This conflict has to be resolved because he
has a radical need for
affirmation. Like all beings, he naturally
desires to be most fully, and so he desires the fullness of the
good--it is just that he will not choose in accordance with what he
really desires. The need for affirmation persists
nonetheless. And affirmation is the natural and proper response
to what is
genuinely good. The problem is that he cannot affirm himself--he
beholds his
depravity and sees others as far less unsightly, which of course spawns
envy--,
yet his egotism
demands affirmation all the more and to a much greater extent and
intensity. The greater his moral depravity, the greater and more
unbearable is this fundamental conflict. He either beholds his
corruption and repents of the choices that brought it about, or he
turns his gaze from it and commits to creating an image, a reflection,
a false self that others will be able to affirm.
He cannot allow others to see what he sees in himself, for they will
reject him. What they see will be
as repulsive to them as it is to himself. So he must create a
highly likable and acceptable image that will procure the affirmation
he requires for himself, an affirmation that he can only get from
others who do not know him as he really is. Thus begins the
fundamental lie of the self-loathing egotist. For an image is a
reflection. One can only see a reflection if it is mirrored in
some way. The egotist must see his reflection through the eyes of
others, and so others become a means to his own affirmation, a means to
his own conviction that he really exists. For the deeply depraved
have created a void, a nothingness in the heart of their
character. But a person cannot detect the presence of
nothingness. Hence, the egotist desperately needs to be convinced
of his own existence. He needs to feel that he is. If he
will not achieve this through the pursuit of virtue, he will do so
through the affirmation, praise, and adulation of others, or through
their fear of him. But what others affirm (or fear) is not the
true self of
the egotist. He cannot show his true self, for he does not know
who or what it is. His true self is fractured, dilapidated, and
in pieces. Thus, it is only a reflection that they affirm.
The habit of treating a human person as a means to an end has a kind of
universal scope to it. One person is a particular instance of a
basic intelligible human good. Just as I come to know the nature
of all human persons by coming to understand a particular instance of
humanity (for all have the same nature), so too, my ability to treat
one individual human being as a means to an end amounts to a
willingness to treat all human persons as a means to an end. And
so wherever the egotist appears to be treating another as an
end in himself, such behaviour is only appearance. At its
roots, it is utilitarian and fundamentally a kind of
manipulation.
The more intense the conflict between the experience of his nothingness
and his emerging egotism, the more radical his manipulation of
others. The more intelligent the egotist, the more able he is to
hide his depravity by means of a clever reflection, and thus the more
able he is to successfully convince others that they are loved and
revered for their own sake. The longer he persists in his
depravity, the more deeply he falls into the void that is decreated by
the choices he continues to make.
From a purely moral point of view, this is how the narcissistic
character disordered are created.[6] They
are self-created, or
better yet, self-decreated, and then re-created, although what is
re-created is not a self, but a reflection or an image. The
greater the opposition between his depravity
or moral nothingness (and thus self-loathing) and his egotism (his
injustice and his regard for others as mere instruments of his own
gratification), the more pathological his narcissism, and thus the more
grandiose and fantastic his reflected or false self.[7]
The narcissist is incapable of love; for his narcissism is the fruit of
his
refusal to revere others for their own sake, that is, to love others as
another self, equal in
dignity to himself.[8] His refusal to love
barred him from loving
himself because he became depleted and less lovable to himself.
What he loves is the false self he has created and that he needs to see
reflected in the affirmation and comportment of others. Such
people are aptly referred to as narcissists. According to the
ancient Greek myth, the nymph Echo fell in love with Narcissus.
She died of a broken heart after being spurned by him. As a
result, Narcissus was punished by the gods for his callousness: the
gods made him fall in love with his own image. He would live till
he saw himself. Eventually, he caught sight of his reflection in
the water, became enthralled with his image and refused to leave the
spot. He died of languor and turned into a flower. As
Alexander Lowen interprets this myth, if Narcissus could say "I love
you", Echo would repeat those words and he would feel loved. The
inability to say "I love you" is precisely what identifies the
narcissist.[9]
And since
he is incapable of truly loving another as another self, all his
relationships with others are perverted, twisted, and abusive; for to
use
a person is to abuse a person, and everyone in his life, without
exception, is nothing more than a means of procuring affirmation,
adulation, and admiration, or if that isn't possible, fear.[10] For it isn't the self that the narcissist
loves, but his reflection.
Characteristics of the Narcissist
The narcissist is calculating. He is utilitarian through and
through. He refuses obedience to the
basic requirements of the natural moral law, for obedience implies that
there is
something larger than himself of which he is not the measure, but which
measures him. Such a notion, however, is incompatible with the
very
thrust of his character. He has become the measure. He is
calculating for the sake of procuring power; for it is power
that allows him the control he needs to protect himself from
exposure and from his having to face his own finitude. Power
allows him to more easily procure a supply of narcissistic fuel.
His entire life has become a struggle to procure this fuel, or what
Samuel Vaknin calls narcissistic
supply,[11] and he will employ the most
devious means at his
disposal to get it. And if, by some misfortune, he should come
into a
position of power, we can expect his style of leadership to be
thoroughly
Machiavellian.
There is no better insight into the workings of the mind of the morally
depraved and narcissistic leader than what is provided in chapter 18 of
Machiavelli's
The Prince. The
principal characteristic of such a leader is not prudence, but craft:
Every one admits how praiseworthy it is
in a prince to keep faith, and to live with integrity and not with
craft. Nevertheless our experience has been that those princes who have
done great things have held good faith of little account, and have
known how to circumvent the intellect of men by craft, and in the end
have overcome those who have relied on their word.[
12]
Because such persons have depleted their character so profoundly
through choices contrary to the norms of reason, they approach the
bestial level and will even begin to see themselves as such. For
beasts are not governed by the natural moral law, but by the law of
power. The narcissistic leader is fundamentally bestial in his
rule, but he cannot appear that way without exposing his true colors,
and exposure is his greatest fear. And so he must employ craft
and know when to "avail himself of the beast". Machiavelli writes:
… it is necessary for a prince to
understand how to avail himself of the beast and the man. …A prince,
therefore, being compelled knowingly to adopt the beast, ought to
choose the fox and the lion; because the lion cannot defend himself
against snares and the fox cannot defend himself against wolves.
Therefore, it is necessary to be a fox to discover the snares and a
lion to terrify the wolves. Those who rely simply on the lion do not
understand what they are about. Therefore a wise lord cannot, nor ought
he to, keep faith when such observance may be turned against him, and
when the reasons that caused him to pledge it exist no longer.[
13]
Such a person, by virtue of his olympian egotism, always regards
others as inferior to himself. Everyone is a simpleton in his
eyes. What helps afford him this illusion is that most people are
unsuspecting and are unaware of the degree to which they are being
taken advantage of, used and abused. This unawareness is not due
to a general lack of intelligence in people, but to their tendency
to
project their own range of normalcy onto others. Hence, their
disinclination to suspect someone so profoundly depraved to be in their
midst, carrying on an existence that is fundamentally and thoroughly a
lie. But the character disordered conveniently regard this trait
as evidence of intellectual inferiority and will take a twisted delight
in the knowledge that they have so many fooled.
But it is necessary to know well how to
disguise this characteristic, and to be a great pretender and
dissembler; and men are so simple, and so subject to present
necessities, that he who seeks to deceive will always find someone who
will allow himself to be deceived.[
14]
When it is a question of evil, it is precisely the element of disguise
that people tend to overlook. We are wont to assume that evil,
character disorder, profound moral depravity, psychopathy, pathological
narcissism, etc., are easy to detect and that such people can only
inspire fear upon a first encounter. But this is
only
the case with those not intelligent enough to disguise their depravity,
like the common criminal. The most dangerous among us are those
intelligent enough to appear as paragons of virtue.
…it is unnecessary for a prince to have
all the good qualities I have enumerated, but it is very necessary to
appear to have them. And I shall dare to say this also, that to have
them and always to observe them is injurious, and that to appear to
have them is useful; to appear merciful, faithful, humane, religious,
upright, and to be so, but with a mind so framed that should you
require not to be so, you may be able and know how to change to the
opposite.… a prince ought to take care that he never lets anything slip
from his lips that is not replete with the above-named five qualities,
that he may appear to him who sees and hears him altogether merciful,
faithful, humane, upright, and religious. There is nothing more
necessary to appear to have than this last quality, inasmuch as men
judge generally more by the eye than by the hand, because it belongs to
everybody to see you, to few to come in touch with you. Every one sees
what you appear to be, few really know what you are, and those few dare
not oppose themselves to the opinion of the many, who have the majesty
of the state to defend them; and in the actions of all men, and
especially of princes, which it is not prudent to challenge, one judges
by the result. ... he will be praised by everybody because the
vulgar are always taken by what a thing seems to be and by what comes
of it; and in the world there are only the vulgar, ...[
15]
With respect to evil, there still exists a sort of half-baked
Platonism in the attitudes of many people, for there is a common
assumption that if
a person is knee deep in depravity, either he does not know any better
or is under the influence of environmental and psychological
determinants he has no control over. But there is a distinction
between intellectual and moral virtue. Morality is in the
will. It is very possible to have a brilliant mind, but at the
same time a wicked and depraved will. The most dangerous
predators among us are ingeniously veiled. They carefully
surround themselves with people entirely unlike themselves, that is,
with deeply empathic human beings who wish to please others, who are
slow to judge, who are excessively tolerant and who have an eye for the
good to be found in others. They know how to exploit to their own
advantage such character traits. It is their association with
such people that maximizes their chances of
perpetuating
the facade and keeping themselves from exposure.
The narcissist despises community and emotional intimacy, and so they
are profoundly lonely. On the one hand, though, there is
something about their loneliness that narcissists like; for they can
attribute it to their unique and
superior nature. But as human persons who have a radical need for
others, they cannot tolerate loneliness. This conflict
is a source of chronic anguish; for loneliness is hell, and yet, as
Sartre would say, "hell is other people" ("l'enfer, c'est les autres").
Man is a person, from the Latin persona
(through sound). He longs to express himself, to communicate
himself to others, whether depraved or not. Just as those who
contemplate the marvelous or the beautiful cannot hold themselves but
will cry out in
praise of what they behold, so too the depraved cannot help but on
occasion burst out and spit their bile, thus providing others a
momentary glimpse of their interior rot. Moments such as these
are clues that must be stored in the memory and, like disparate pieces
of a puzzle, assembled later in order to acquire a more complete
picture, which will be a horror to behold, or an experience of
terror--if the narcissist discovers that he has been found
out by you.[16]. The clues, in isolation, will
suggest
only minor imperfections or character flaws. But
taken together over a number of years, they suggest something much
more ominous. The inconsistencies evident in the behaviour of the
narcissist--prior to his discovery--should never be simply accepted,
only to be forgotten. Rather, one must ponder the inconsistencies
in
behaviour until they become consistent, that is, until the apparently
inconsistent behaviour acquires an intelligible narrative that rings
true.
Some pathological narcissists are so clever that certain people will
simply never be able to penetrate the disguise, no matter what has been
pointed out to them. One reason they are so successful is that
they have come to believe their own lies. The narcissist has
convinced
himself that the facade is not a lie. What helps to establish
this conviction, among other things, is a commitment to a cause--a
genuinely good cause. But after a few years of observation, one
discovers that the narcissist's devotion to the cause is one sided and
not grounded in a commitment to the principles underlying the cause,
because after a time the inconsistency of the morality of the depraved
becomes noticeable. His behavior, in other words, is not
principled. And he will despise any individual or institution
that expounds a consistent ethics, because it exposes his own
inconsistent and arbitrary one and is a constant reminder of his own
self-deception.
It cannot be emphasized enough just how much we typically underestimate
the depravity of the pathological narcissist who
operates behind a facade of respectability and altruism. We
cannot forget that they have a desperate fear of exposure, that someone
might catch a long enough glimpse at the rot that lies within and raise
the awareness of others, thus threatening the power
structure that took years of careful planning to erect. That is
why the pathological
narcissist is a long
term plotter, like the brilliant chess player who plans ten or more
moves ahead. It is almost impossible for anyone to uncover the
complex and multi-layered schemes of such a person unless one is
entirely aware of the depths of his depravity and the level of his
intelligence. Knowing the one without the other leaves one ever
open to being perpetually deceived.
The awareness that others have seen contradictory aspects of himself is
a constant source of anxiety for the narcissist in a position of
authority. For he is not only aware of the limits of human
perspectives but also that
community has the power to enlarge individual points of view.
When people talk with one another, they begin to acquire a much larger
perspective on things, that is, they begin to see a bigger
picture. The pathological narcissist who is in a leadership role
cannot afford
to have people talking amongst themselves and sharing stories. So
he will go to great lengths and carefully contrive very devious and
underhanded
schemes to keep people divided. He will sow division among
colleagues by planting lies about one person to another, and another
about someone else. This can be a successful strategy because no
one expects a highly intelligent adult to be carrying on like a
scheming eight year old child or an emotionally disturbed
adolescent. And since most of us avoid confrontation, it is much
easier to believe the liar.
The pathological narcissist succeeds for a time because of the extreme
resonance of his personality structure. As Samuel Vaknin
writes: "Narcissists appear to be
unpleasantly deliberate... They are too human, or too inhuman, or too
modest, or too haughty, or too loving, or too cold, or too empathic, or
too strong, or too industrious, or too casual, or too enthusiastic, or
too indifferent, or too courteous, or too abrasive." [17]
He is, in some ways, an enigma, at least prior to his exposure.
If one has thought about him enough, one can't but reason that he's
either an outstanding citizen, leader, priest,
court judge,
teacher, etc., or he's the most morally depraved individual you are
going to meet for a long while. And very few of us expect to
discover such a depth of depravity in a well dressed professional
adult. So we naturally conclude the former. For he is
careful not to show opposite extremes to one and the same
person, especially if that person is someone he needs. The
majority in his immediate environment will see his "too good" side
only. Should anyone no longer be needed, or should one happen to
become a threat to his facade, such a one is likely to get a taste of
the narcissist's vindictive nature, even one who has been a close
"friend" to him for a number of years--a narcissist's loyalty is paper
thin, for he is incapable of genuinely intimate friendships [18]. But only the targeted victim will see his
vindictive nature, or a small few. He is careful to
keep this side of himself from others, for it is an inconsistency that
might expose him. So adept is he at this narrowly focused
persecution, in fact, that any attempt by the victim to tell another
will in all probability make him (the victim) appear as if he is losing
his
mind.
The narcissist takes advantage of every opportunity to favor a person
who is down and in need--as long as the prospects that he will be of
use later on are good. Such favors might include providing
employment,
personal counseling, boosting one's confidence, flattery, listening and
being sympathetic (at least apparently), etc. Such opportunities
supply the narcissist in a number of ways. Primarily, they ensure
loyalty for the day that will inevitably arrive, the day when his
personal edifice crumbles and he finally falls into the pit he has
dug for his enemies over the years. Such a loyal following makes
it all the more difficult for anyone to depose him. They also
have the added advantage of helping him to persuade himself that he is
good and that perhaps the gnawing awareness of that damp and dark
cellar at the heart of his character was only a passing fancy.
Furthermore, they provide a sense of superiority in that others depend
upon him in order to be the persons they have become. When
someone finally comes to realize that he is a treacherous and
exploitative fraud--which is inevitable--, who is going to believe such
a person when so many have been directly benefited by the
accused? Gratitude makes it easier to excuse his "faults" or
minor character flaws, and that is about all that the clues
will suggest in isolation--and most people have poor memories.
The depraved and pathological narcissist is very ready to forgive the
faults of others, not because he is loving and merciful, but rather
because he is indifferent. In fact, inordinate leniency is
typical of narcissists. They are either vindictive or lenient,
but rarely just. Leniency, which is a vice, is hard to
distinguish from mercy or
clemency, so it enables him to feel virtuous, and it also helps
perpetuate the appearance of moral purity. Moreover, leniency
provides another opportunity to ensure loyalty.
But ultimately, the pathological narcissist is indifferent to injustice
and its victims. As St. Thomas Aquinas argues, the more excellent
a person is, the more he is prone to anger (S.T. I-II, 47, 3). But the
narcissist experiences no righteous indignation. He only rages
against the person who is a threat to his charade and/or who refuses to
cooperate with his underhanded schemes. But he will not be
incensed at injustice.[19]
Courage is the mean between recklessness and cowardliness.
Here, narcissists are also at both extremes, never in the mean.
Indeed, they
are often bold or inordinately daring. Their inflated sense of
superiority propels them to recklessness; for they are subject to
fantasies of omnipotence and unequalled brilliance, and they feel that
they are above the law. And it is this sense of
superiority that allows them to underestimate the intelligence and
determination of their adversaries.[20] But
they are not brave; they are cowards at heart. They lack the
courage to gaze upon the dilapidated specter of their true selves, nor
can they bear to look into the eyes of one who has discovered their
true nature. They inspire terror only because we recognize that
the inhibitions that govern the impulses of normal healthy persons are
completely lacking in the pathological narcissist. They are
psychopaths.[21]. The terror they inspire is a
source of narcissistic supply that contributes to their sense of
existing, which they need to counter the sense of their own
nothingness, created by their immoral and unrepented choices.
Narcissists and Religion
Narcissists, in accordance with their Machiavellian mindframe,
will often appear religious, especially if they are leaders. But
they may also subscribe to a religion in an effort to understand their
special status, which they believe they enjoy. As Samuel Vaknin
writes of the narcissist: "he is a captive of the false conviction that
his uniqueness destines him to fulfill a mission of cosmic
significance." [22]
The narcissist despises authority and is totally incapable of
collaboration. That is why he inevitably seeks a position of
authority, even in a religious context. Should he be Catholic, he
will most certainly come into conflict with the teaching authority of
the Church, for he has a need to defy authority, and he refuses to be
measured by anything larger than himself, even God. Vaknin
describes what the narcissistic cycle of extreme valuation and
devaluation looks like in a religious context. Those who are
sources of narcissistic supply are highly valued by the narcissist, not
for their own sake, but for what they provide him. Should that
production come to a stand still, should a person ever come to discover
the true nature of the narcissist hidden underneath all his colorful
layers, he is quickly and thoroughly devalued and demonized. As
was said above, the narcissist is initially religious in an effort to
understand his own uniqueness. He is a disciple--chosen-- by
virtue of a
special quality in him, and not really by virtue of the mercy and
gratuitous love of
God. He is incapable of genuine humility and worship of what is
larger than himself, and so God is eventually devalued, for He does not
remain a source of narcissistic supply for long. The true
disciple delights in the law of God: "The law of your mouth is to
me more precious than thousands of gold and silver pieces" (Ps 119,
72). But despite appearances, the religious narcissist personally
finds that law a maddening nuisance that unnecessarily limits his
sources of narcissistic supply, namely the entire secular world.
Religious narcissists, thus, tend to be compromising liberals, watering
down
the difficult truth so as to be more inviting and inclusive. But
all they ever really invite and include are sources of narcissistic
supply, nothing more (this, of course, is not to suggest that all
liberals are narcissists).
But religion has afforded the narcissist with a position of
authority, which in turn is a reliable source of narcissistic
supply. Hence, the reason some of them do not leave the
Church--much to the dismay of some of the faithful. They are
inconsistent in their leadership; for they are disloyal to the teaching
magisterium, but they demand unquestioning loyalty and absolute
deference to their own authority. Should this demand for
obedience become too obvious, they can very cleverly appear to employ a
democratic style of leadership and receive input from everyone.
With a large enough number of people at hand, the clever narcissist can
find fragments of his own vision in some of their ideas. If one
watches
carefully, one notices how he collects those very
pieces and assembles them into a vision which everyone thinks was
democratically determined. But the final product in no way will
have differed significantly from what he had decided originally, before
consulting anyone. The democratic process, which was under his
control from the beginning, only lends the appearance of collaboration
and democracy.
The pseudo-religious narcissist will especially identify with certain
biblical imagery, such as the Good Shepherd, which depicts a human
person amidst irrational animals of an inferior nature. The
Parable of the Talents lends itself very well to the narcissist's
twisted mind. In this parable, some servants are given five
talents, another two, to a third only one, each in proportion to his
ability. The narcissist of course sees himself as a ten and
everyone else as a two or a one. Only those whom he needs and who
supply him with fuel qualify as a ten, but these may quickly find
themselves reduced to a two or a one should their status as supplier
suddenly change. Such a parable can become a useful tool of
manipulation and flattery. In short, the narcissist's use of
scripture is as twisted as Satan's in the temptation in the
wilderness.
There have been a number of false norms that have been made popular
over the years that have only made it easier for the depraved and
pathological narcissist to continue undetected. The popular
exhortation to be tolerant, positive, non-judgmental and inclusive are
prime examples. If a person sees the glass half full, he is
positive
and optimistic, but negative and pessimistic if he sees it half
empty. The problem here, though, is that evil is parasitic.
As was
said above, there is simply no such thing as pure evil, because evil is
a lack of due being. The optimist who refuses to
see the lack lest he begin to feel negative is blinding himself to evil
and contributing to the creation of the kind of environment that the
depraved require in order to flourish. Good is the very subject
of evil. And so there will always be something good
to behold in the morally depraved egotist. The half full/half
empty platitude is simply useless, except for the ridiculously cynical
that no one takes seriously anyway.
The biblical precept not to judge (Cf. Mt 7ff) is not and has never
been an unqualified and absolute norm, as if making judgments were
intrinsically evil. Rather, the biblical norm is qualified by the
context in which we find it: "Why do you observe the splinter in your
brother's eye and never notice the great log in your own?...Take the
log out of your own eye first, and then you will see clearly enough to
take the splinter out of your brother's eye" (Mt 7, 4-5).
Scripture does not assert that all of us have logs in our eyes that we
are forever unable to remove, thus barring us from ever having to judge
that someone might have a splinter in his. The norm bears upon
the hypocrisy of the morally blind passing judgment on someone much
better off morally and spiritually. It is not a precept against
making judgments; for as St. Paul says: "The spiritual man judges
all things, yet he himself is rightly judged by no one (1 Co 2,
15). Scripture is filled with examples of negative judgments (Cf.
Acts 5, 1-5; 8, 21-22; Rm 1, 1ff; Eph 4, 5). The narcissist is
ever scheming to create a safe environment primarily for himself,[23] and so what could better serve him than
to be surrounded by people who are committed to an unqualified refusal
to make judgments?
Narcissists will forever seek positions of power. But such
positions must be forever denied them. They must
never be given authority. But so few are denied positions of
authority because
they are so adept at disguise. They are convincing, articulate,
and charismatic. But the narcissist is all about power. His
entire leadership is a game played ultimately for the sake of
himself. Everyone under his authority is being abused in one form
or another, and the damage he can do is far reaching. The
facade he uses to hide his depravity and fool the world may very well
contain genuinely good things, such as religious, political, judicial,
or educational principles. But most of his victims will forever
associate his deception with these good things and will be unable to
distinguish between what is genuinely good from the narcissist's abuse
of it. In rejecting the one, they inevitably reject the
other. How many good things are irretrievably lost to others as a
result of such abuse?
Conditions for Penetrating the Disguise
How is it possible to maximize one's chances of penetrating the almost
impenetrable disguises of the character disordered? And how do we
keep ourselves from falling into the web of their deceitful
scheming?
First, it is a mistake to decide never to trust another human
being. There are many honest persons who are entirely
trustworthy. But there is a difference between trusting another
and trusting in another.
We ought not to forget that every man is fundamentally a man: "It is
better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in man. It is
better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in princes" (Ps 118,
8-9).
We should also learn to cultivate a kind of "spiritual Kantianism"; for
it was the German philosopher Immanuel Kant who distinguished between phenomenon (appearance, or the
world as it appears to us) and noumenon
(the thing in itself, insofar as it is not an object of our sensible
intuition). This distinction may not be sound epistemology, for
it led ultimately to Idealism and Post-Modernism, but we should
nonetheless understand that things are not always as they appear to
be. Evil is brilliantly inconspicuous: "There is a wickedness
which is unscrupulous but nonetheless dishonest, and there are those
who misuse kindness to win their case. There is the person who
will walk bowed down with grief, when inwardly this is nothing but
deceit: he hides his face and pretends to be deaf, if he is not
unmasked, he will take advantage of you. There is the person who
is prevented from sinning by lack of strength, yet he will do wrong
when he gets the chance" (Si 19, 20-30).
Anyone who goes for a stroll in a posh residential neighborhood
naturally assumes that the interior of the houses are for the most part
as attractive as their exterior. No one, upon entering, expects
to find a desolate interior, that is, a mass of rubble. But some
human beings are not always who we expect them to be; for we naturally
project our own basic character traits onto others. But this is
not always prudent: "Someone with a sly wink is plotting
mischief, no one can dissuade him from it. Honey-tongued to your
face, he is lost in admiration at your words; but behind your back he
has other things to say, and turns your words into a stumbling-block"
(Si 27, 22-23).
The character disordered are highly intuitive. Samuel Vaknin
writes: "The narcissist, above all, is a shrewd manipulator of human
character and its fault lines." [24] Moreover,
he "is possessed
of an uncanny ability to psychologically penetrate others."[25]
If we do not wish to find ourselves cooperating in the underhanded
schemes of the character disordered, we must decide from the outset
never to compromise justice, nor do evil that good may come of
it. We ought to commit to frequent confession, for unrepented sin
can lead to our becoming permissive under the guise of being tolerant
and forgiving. But the permissive are not forgiving, only
indifferent. The unrepentant excuse themselves, and motivated by
an unconscious desire to be excused by others (not forgiven, which
implies confession and contrition), he will readily excuse the faults
and failings of others, obliging them to do likewise. Hence, the
current widespread approbation of tolerance as the perfection of
justice. But tolerance is not necessarily a virtue, for there is
a great deal that love refuses to tolerate. Again, such confusion
only establishes the conditions that the character disordered depend
upon in order to keep themselves from being exposed. We can
undermine such conditions by praying that we might be given a horror of
sin and by cultivating a hatred of injustice.
To keep oneself from being fooled by the narcissist whose facade
includes Catholicism, we only have to remain faithful to Peter.
The narcissist cannot but defy authority, and if he is highly
intelligent, his dissent will be subtle and covert. He will be
loved by the majority for his "progressive" and "compassionate"
posture, but he cannot afford to be too overt in his liberalism.
If he is ordained, he will plot for ecclesiastical office, for he is
not content with the
humble and obscure life of a simple priest, which is why as a priest,
his ministry almost always takes on a theatrical hue. He will do
things out of the ordinary, often subtly unorthodox, things that call
attention to
himself and make him popular with a particular contingent of the
parish. But underneath the facade, nonetheless, lurks a man who
is anything but compassionate, as some people eventually discover.[26]
By remaining faithful to Peter, one takes a path that ultimately the
narcissist cannot follow. It is by virtue of this fidelity that
we share in the benefits of Christ's prayer for Peter: "Simon,
Simon! Look, Satan has got his wish to sift you all like wheat;
but I have prayed for you, Simon, that your faith may not fail, and
once you have recovered, you in your turn must strengthen your
brothers" (Lk 22, 31). All of them will be sifted like wheat, but
Peter will not fail, not by virtue of his own strength--from this
angle, he failed--, but by virtue of Christ's prayer for him.
There will be made available to us all sorts of solid objects for us to
hold onto that
will provide the appearance of stability, but these solid objects are
only floating debris, pushed along by the current. Only the rock
(petros) embedded into the river floor is truly stable and
unyielding. Hang onto that, and we resist the passing current of
deceptive ideas and ever changing mores.
Notes
1. "Every art and every inquiry, and similarly
every action and pursuit, is thought to aim at some good; and for this
reason the good has rightly been declared to be that at which all
things aim." NE.
Bk 1, 1.
2. Enchir.
13.
3. Sartre writes: "But if existence really
does precede essence, man is responsible for what he is. Thus,
existentialism's first move is to make every man aware of what he is
and to make the full responsibility of his existence rest on him.
And when we say that a man is responsible for himself, we do not only
mean that he is responsible for his own individuality, but that he is
responsible for all men." Existentialism
and Human Emotion. New York:. Philosophical Library. 1985. p.16.
4. Often the terms 'personality' and 'character'
are used
interchangeably. But if by personality we mean aspects of the
self that
are determined, such as temperament and environmentally determined
behaviour patterns, neurosis, etc, then character is not the same thing
as personality. One may have a distasteful personality, but good
moral character. Conversely, one may have a great personality,
but bad character.
5. The Meaning
of Love. London, Floris
Books. pp.
42-44
6. The
Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of
Mental Disorders, fourth
Edition (American Psychiatric Association), lists the following
criteria for 301.81 Narcissistic Personality Disorder: A
pervasive
pattern of grandiosity (in fantasy or behavior), need for admiration,
and lack of empathy, beginning by early adulthood and present in a
variety of contexts, as indicated by five (or more) of the following:
(1) has a grandiose sense of
self-importance (e.g., exaggerates achievements and talents, expects to
be recognized as superior without commensurate achievements)
(2) is preoccupied with fantasies of unlimited success, power,
brilliance, beauty, or ideal love
(3) believes that he or she is "special" and unique and can only be
understood by, or should associate with, other special or high-status
people (or institutions)
(4) requires excessive admiration
(5) has a sense of entitlement, i.e., unreasonable expectations of
especially favorable treatment or automatic compliance with his or her
expectations
(6) is interpersonally exploitative, i.e., takes advantage of others to
achieve his or her own ends
(7) lacks empathy: is unwilling to recognize or identify with the
feelings and needs of others
(8) is often envious of others or believes that others are envious of
him or her
(9) shows arrogant, haughty behaviors or attitudes
Samuel Vaknin, a leading authority on Narcissistic Personality
Disorder,
proposes the following amended criteria:
- Feels grandiose and self-important (e.g., exaggerates
accomplishments, talents, skills,
contacts, and personality traits to the point of lying, demands
to be recognised as superior without commensurate achievements);
- Is obsessed with
fantasies of unlimited success, fame,
fearsome power or omnipotence,
unequalled brilliance (the
cerebral narcissist), bodily
beauty or sexual performance (the
somatic narcissist), or ideal, everlasting,
all-conquering love or passion;
- Firmly convinced that he or she is unique and, being special, can
only be understood by, should only
be treated by, or associate with, other special or unique, or
high-status people (or institutions);
- Requires excessive admiration, adulation,
attention and affirmation – or,
failing that, wishes to be feared and to be notorious (Narcissistic
Supply);
- Feels entitled. Demands
automatic and full compliance with his or her unreasonable
expectations for special and favourable
priority treatment;
- Is "interpersonally exploitative", i.e., uses others to achieve his or her
own ends;
- Devoid of empathy. Is unable or unwilling to identify
with, acknowledge, or accept
the feelings, needs, preferences,
priorities, and choices of others;
- Constantly envious of others and
seeks to hurt or destroy the objects of his or her frustration. Suffers
from persecutory (paranoid) delusions as he or she believes that
they feel the same about him or her and
are likely to act similarly;
- Behaves arrogantly and haughtily. Feels superior, omnipotent, omniscient,
invincible, immune, "above the law", and omnipresent (magical thinking).
Rages when frustrated,
contradicted, or confronted by people he or she considers
inferior to him or her and unworthy.
See Malignant Self Love: Narcissism
Revisited. Prague & Skopje: Narcissus Publication,
2003. pp. 20-21. Let me say at the outset that I do not deny that
there are a host of
environmental conditions that are common in the upbringing of those
with a Narcissistic Personality Disorder that contribute to it, such as
a narcissistic parent, humiliation, etc. But environmental
conditions are never enough to explain human behavior. I would argue
that freedom and will consist in our relationship to our environment
and all that determines us.
7. According to Alexander Lowen, there are
degrees of narcissism.
Beginning with the lowest degree, there is the phallic-narcissistic
character, or what Samuel Vaknin refers to as the somatic narcissist,
the narcissistic character, the
borderline personality, the psychopathic personality, and the paranoid
personality. Narcissism:
Denial of the True Self. New York: Touchstone. 1997.
pp.14-24
8. Samuel Vaknin writes: "Our experience of
what it is like to be human - our very humanness depends largely on our
self-knowledge and on our experience of our selves. In other words:
only through being himself and through experiencing his self - can a
human being fully appreciate the humanness of others. The narcissist
has precious little experience of his self. Instead, he lives in an
invented world, of his own design, where he is a fictitious figure in a
grandiose script. He, therefore, possesses no tools which enable him to
cope with other human beings, share their emotions, put himself in
their place (=empathise) and, of course, love them - the most demanding
task of interrelating. He just does not know what it means to be
human." Malignant Self Love:
Narcissism Revisited. p.92.
9. Narcissism:
Denial of the True Self. pp. 26-27.
10 "…since the narcissist is unable to
secure the long-term positive
love, admiration, or even attention of his Sources of Supply- he
resorts to a mirror strategy. In other words, the narcissist
becomes
paranoid. Better to be the object of (often imaginary and always
self-inflicted) derision, score, and bile- than to be ignored.
Being
envied is prefereable to being treated with indifference. If he
cannot
be loved- the narcissist would rather be feared or hated than
forgotten." Malignant Self Love:
Narcissism Revisited. p. 97. Further on he writes:
"Hate is the complement
of fear
and narcissists like being feared. It imbues them with an intoxicating
sensation of omnipotence. Many of them are veritably inebriated
by the looks of horror or repulsion on people's faces: 'They know that
I am
capable of anything.' The sadistic narcissist perceives himself
as
Godlike, ruthless and devoid of scruples, capricious and unfathomable,
emotionless and non-sexual, omniscient, omnipotent and omnipresent, a
plague, a devastation, an inescapable verdict. He nurtures his
ill-repute, stoking it and fanning the flames of gossip. It is an
enduring asset. Hate and fear are sure generators of attention. It is
all about Narcissistic Supply, of course - the drug which narcissists
consume and which consumes them in return." Ibid., p. 161
11. Samuel Vaknin writes: "The narcissist
derives his sense of being, his experience of his own existence, and
his self-worth from the outside. He mines others for Narcissistic
Supply - adulation, attention, reflection, fear. Their reactions stalk
his furnace. Absent Narcissistic Supply - the narcissist disintegrates
and self -annihilates. When unnoticed, he feels empty and worthless.
The narcissist MUST delude himself into believing that he is
persistently the focus and object of the attentions, intentions, plans,
feelings, and stratagems of other people. The narcissist faces a stark
choice - either be (or become) the permanent centre of the world, or
cease to be altogether. Ibid.,
p. 95
12. Nicolo Machiavelli. The Prince. Chicago: Encyclopedia
Britannica, Inc. Great Books of the Western World. R. M.
Hutchins, editor in chief. Volume 23. Machiavelli -
Hobbes. p. 25
13. Loc. cit.
14. Loc. cit.
15. Loc. cit.
16. "Terror denotes an intense fear, which is
somewhat prolonged and may refer to imagined or future dangers.
"Horror" implies a sense of shock and dread. The danger to which
it refers contains an element of evil and may threaten others rather
than the self." Lowen.
Op. cit.,
p. 132.
17. Op.
cit. p.
126.
18. "He idealises his nearest and dearest not
because he is smitten by
emotion – but because he needs to captivate them and to convince
himself that they are worthy Sources of Supply, despite their flaws and
mediocrity. Once he deems them useless, he discards and devalues
them
similarly cold-bloodedly. A predator, always on the lookout, he
debases the coin of “love” as he corrupts everything else in himself
and around him. Ibid., p. 149
19. "The narcissist “knows” that he can do
anything he chooses to do
and excel in it. What the narcissist does, what he excels at,
what he
achieves, depends only on his volition. To his mind, there is no other
determinant. Hence his rage when confronted with disagreement or
opposition - not only because of the audacity of his, evidently
inferior, adversaries. But because it threatens his world view, it
endangers his feeling of omnipotence. The narcissist is often fatuously
daring, adventurous, experimentative and curious precisely due to this
hidden assumption of "can-do". He is genuinely surprised and devastated
when he fails, when the "universe" does not arrange itself, magically,
to accommodate his unbounded fantasies, when it (and people in it) does
not comply with his whims and wishes." Ibid., pp. 98-99
20. "Narcissism is ridiculous. Narcissists
are pompous, grandiose,
repulsive and contradictory. There is a serious mismatch between
who
they really are and what they really achieve – and how they think about
themselves. It is not that the narcissist merely thinks that he
is far
superior to other humans intellectually. The perception of his
superiority is ingrained in him, it is a part of his every mental cell,
an all-pervasive sensation, an instinct and a drive. He feels
that he
is entitled to special treatment and to outstanding consideration
because he is such a unique specimen. He knows this to be true –
the
same way one knows that one is surrounded by air. It is an
integral
part of his identity. More integral to him than his body...
Because he
considers himself so special and so superior, he has no way of knowing
how it is to be THEM – nor the inclination to explore it. In
other
words, the narcissist cannot and will not empathise. Can you
empathise
with an ant? Empathy implies identity or equality, both abhorrent
to
the narcissist." Ibid., pp.
153-154
21. Dr. Stanton E. Samenow, leading expert on
the criminal mind,
writes: "Despite possible differences in background and the
difference
in modus operandi of the crime, the mentality of a person who robs a
bank and a corporate executive who perpetrates fraud is the same. Both
pursue power and control at the expense of others. Both are able to
shut off considerations of consequences and considerations of
conscience. Neither has an operational concept of injury to others.
Neither puts himself/herself in the place of others. There are numerous
other thought patterns common to both. Furthermore, the offense for
which either is caught more likely than not represents only the tip of
the iceberg of each offender's irresponsibility and illegal conduct.
Both know the laws, calculate carefully so they can succeed at their
objectives. Both experience excitement at each phase of the crime --
from the initial idea through the execution of the act(s) itself
(themselves). If apprehended, each will case out those who hold them
accountable and feed them what they think they want to hear or ought to
know. And they will try to dispel responsibility by implicating or
outright blaming others. Concept
of the Month, May 2003
<http://members.cox.net/samenow/conceptmay_03.html>
22. Op. cit.,
p. 202. Furthermore, he writes: "God is everything the
narcissist ever wants
to be: omnipotent, omniscient, omnipresent, admired, much discussed,
and awe inspiring". Ibid., p.
396
23. "He recruits people around him to affirm his
choice and to confirm to him that reality is unreal and his fantasyland
is reality. …The narcissist does not go through a midlife
crisis. Forever the child, forever dreaming and fantasizing,
forever begging for accolades, the narcissist’s sad figure inhabits the
twilight zone between sanity and its absence." Ibid., p. 215
24. Ibid.,
p. 174.
25. Ibid.,
p. 189.
26. "The narcissist is seething with enmity and
venom. He is a
receptacle of unbridled hatred, animosity, and hostility. When he can,
the narcissist often turns to physical violence. But the non-physical
manifestations of his pent-up bile are even more terrifying, more
all-pervasive, and more lasting. Beware of narcissists bearing gifts.
They are bound to explode in your faces, or poison you. The narcissist
hates you wholeheartedly and thoroughly simply because you are.
Remembering this has a survival value." Ibid., p. 207
Copyright © 2005 by Douglas P. McManaman
All Rights Reserved
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